Are You A Priority?
– Written by Becci Simon
Making yourself a priority enables you to be a better person, not just for yourself, but for the relationships that you establish along your journey. If you don’t take care of you, then you won’t be able and can’t take care of others. You are a priority and you matter.
Here are several ways for you to put yourself as a priority and to value yourself. Make yourself an important person in your life. It’s crucial and it starts with you.
1. Don’t settle for anything less than what is good for you.
Some people may stay in their jobs longer than they should even though they don’t like it or find fulfillment in it because of the salary. Some settle in relationships that are no longer beneficial to them or that may even be hurting themselves. Some of us choose to stay with friends who take and keep taking because we long for any kind of companionship. Whatever you choose to settle for, trust me, it’s not worth the cost. You deserve peace of mind and to have a life filled with joy and happiness.
If you are continually saying to yourself, “There has to be something better than this”, you are probably settling. Don’t settle for less. Don’t settle for anything less than the best!
2. Don’t compare yourself to others
This is a losing battle. You won’t win and you will only make yourself miserable. Not only do we have a tendency to look for the things we don’t have, but we often find ourselves in the feeling of lack. Don’t worry about your neighbor or co-worker. Don’t compare yourself to the “Jones”. Unless you have been in their shoes, walked the road they have walked and gone through their experiences, you are comparing yourself to information that can not be accurate because it’s not your life. When we compare ourselves to someone else, we are taking the focus off of ourselves on putting it onto that other person. But your power lies in things you can affect in your life not their life. You are unique. There is nobody on this earth that is like you! Treasure that gift.
A good way is to start to shift your focus on things that are going good in your life. Pay attention and focus on the person in the mirror who is looking back at you. You have your own unique qualities. Let go of the inner voice that says you have to be perfect. Appreciate who you are – your smile, your talents, what you have to give. Start to see your value and that is the fastest way to shift focus to the right place.
3. Encourage healthy relationships
Either distance yourself or completely let go of anything that causes you to feel less than good about yourself. Be with people who bring positivity and significance to your life. Make it a priority to have at least one or two people who feed your soul, who accepts you for who you are and who encourages your dreams and goals. No alternatives. No alterations. It is critical to cultivate strong, nurturing friendships. By doing this, we are encouraged to remember that we are not alone in this world.
4. Start appreciating and be thankful
Appreciate everything and be thankful. Appreciate the home you have, the bed you sleep in at night, your significant other, family, friends, job, food, church. Appreciate every breath that you take. Appreciate every day you have been given. Don’t forget to appreciate what you bring into this world. You matter and make a contribution. Start looking for the job you bring to others. Realize that impact of that joy you have on others and the ripple effect that it has. Just because you may not be able to see it, does not mean it has not extended itself further than you can imagine.
The more you appreciate and are thankful, the more good will flow into your life.
5. Set healthy boundaries and stick to them
This is important. Having clear boundaries is vital to establishing relationships that are mutually respectful. It may be difficult to believe, but putting “up” boundaries actually creates freedom because when our needs are clearly defined, there is no need to put up walls. Boundaries reflect our self-esteem and our values. A healthy self-respect will teach others how to treat you.
And when the occasional person attempts to push against your lines, and trust me this will happen, keep your feet placed firmly on the ground and stick to your boundaries. You are worth it.
6. Learn to say No
This one is difficult for so many people. While we are here to help one another there will be times we’re tempted to do things at the expense of our own well-being. Sometimes when we give too much we don’t allow the other person to learn from choices or have their own life experiences and consequences. Continually doing things out of obligation can lead to resentment and hurt the relationship. Instead, learn how to say no and follow through. It is not always bad to say “No” and can actually save you.
‘No’ can be good, because when we say no to others we are saying “yes” to ourselves and we’re in alignment with our values. Allow yourself to say no once in a while. This practice will improve your self-worth and create an opportunity for people to value and respect you more.
7. Follow your heart and dreams
Everyone has a dream. Sometimes, we may lose it along the way but we can find it again. We all have something that makes us come alive and gives our lives meaning. Don’t forget to listen to the part of you that drives your happiness. Your journey can get side-tracked but don’t lose your dream. They never go away. They just get postponed.
Our passions can be as little or as big as you want them to be. We can have one or a dozen of them. It’s important to listen to them and follow your heart. Listen to the things that are ticking at your heart. Find a way to do one thing at a time to make your dreams become a reality. You can do it.